Self-Talk, Mental Rehearsal, & Mental Debriefing
Self-talk is vital for stability. If you are someone that pushes yourself towards growth daily, you might know better than others how to conjure up the motivation to keep moving forward. If you are feeling inadequate or insecure, start speaking to yourself like you are about to fight in a boxing match. “I'm the greatest, i am fearless, i am dangerous, i am capable, i am a beast, raw, the man, the woman. Whatever it takes. Another trick i like to run parallel with self talk is motivational videos. Youtube them! If you get to a point where you are so tired and you feel like you just can't go on, watch these videos for 30 minutes. It is hard not to feel like you could pick up the world after turning these videos on. Save these videos for your hardest days, when you know that you could not move another inch. They revitalize you like water in a desert.
Mental rehearsal can be fun, but it can be dangerous. I am an advocate of mental rehearsal for job interviews, speeches, performances, presentations, tough phone calls, conversations, etc. Something that gives me a bad taste of mental rehearsal is my tendency to over analyze. If you need to complete an assignment, task, or check something off your to do list, mental rehearsal might be the wrong tool to use. Self talk sounds like it might be what you are looking for. If you mentally rehearse during the wrong moment, you could end up in a familiar state to myself, analysis paralysis. Know when you need to walk yourself through a scenario multiple times, and know when you need to take action. After you take action, the real learning can begin.
When you mentally debrief a moment, you methodically break down each idea you can clearly remember from a given memory. Please note that you can only control your actions. Keeping this idea in your head helps you to remember that there are only things that you can do differently, not others in the memory. If you can focus on everything you do wrong in any given situation, you can practice towards mastery of this situation.
Earlier this morning, I was thinking about this girl that kneed me in the private during a rock concert many years ago. Her boyfriend stood there and laughed while I was in agony. She did this for no other reason than our group was getting pushed into theirs. Ridiculous. I played through this memory so many times in my head. “I could beat the hell out of the boyfriend. I could have lit up the girl, it is not okay to hit men either. I could of went to the officers there and proceed to press assault charges. I could of cussed her out. I could have tried to not let my group push their direction.” Most of these thoughts are useless. Why? I was obsessing about a memory of the actions of another person. This is a bad use of mental debriefing, although it was not a complete waste.
A good example of mental debriefing goes like this. I had an accounting interview some years ago that i did not get hired for. I was crushing the interview. Me and the interviewer were laughing and throwing around business suggestions. At a point towards the end of the interview I decided to test my vocab skills and use a word i did not fully understand at the time. “Infamous.” I used the word to describe how we were known amongst the people we serviced in our field. The interviewer got a confused face, and the rest of the interview was a babbling nightmare. I have the tendency to just start talking when i feel anxious. Usually it is a mumble. Not a great interview quality. I held tight to my word usage and did not try to compensate for anything. I googled the meaning of the word after the interview and knew it was not going to be a happy ending. All i can really do is laugh about this situation, and what i learned was to not use words i do not completely understand during interviews, and to realize when i feel anxious and turn my bumbling into something internal. I played through this hundreds of times in my head.
All three of these topics are just as important as the last. You must motivate yourself with self talk, prepare yourself with rehearsal, and perfect presentation with debriefing. These tools can be used in so many facets of life. Friendships, family, relationships, parenting, interviews, rock concerts, any place where you have to make tough decisions. If a tough situation is coming, motivate, rehearse, and afterwords debrief. The next time one of these situations arises you will be that much more prepared to deal with it. Become the best you every today. Tomorrow you can be alright with yesterday being the second best you until the next tomorrow.
Mental rehearsal can be fun, but it can be dangerous. I am an advocate of mental rehearsal for job interviews, speeches, performances, presentations, tough phone calls, conversations, etc. Something that gives me a bad taste of mental rehearsal is my tendency to over analyze. If you need to complete an assignment, task, or check something off your to do list, mental rehearsal might be the wrong tool to use. Self talk sounds like it might be what you are looking for. If you mentally rehearse during the wrong moment, you could end up in a familiar state to myself, analysis paralysis. Know when you need to walk yourself through a scenario multiple times, and know when you need to take action. After you take action, the real learning can begin.
When you mentally debrief a moment, you methodically break down each idea you can clearly remember from a given memory. Please note that you can only control your actions. Keeping this idea in your head helps you to remember that there are only things that you can do differently, not others in the memory. If you can focus on everything you do wrong in any given situation, you can practice towards mastery of this situation.
Earlier this morning, I was thinking about this girl that kneed me in the private during a rock concert many years ago. Her boyfriend stood there and laughed while I was in agony. She did this for no other reason than our group was getting pushed into theirs. Ridiculous. I played through this memory so many times in my head. “I could beat the hell out of the boyfriend. I could have lit up the girl, it is not okay to hit men either. I could of went to the officers there and proceed to press assault charges. I could of cussed her out. I could have tried to not let my group push their direction.” Most of these thoughts are useless. Why? I was obsessing about a memory of the actions of another person. This is a bad use of mental debriefing, although it was not a complete waste.
All three of these topics are just as important as the last. You must motivate yourself with self talk, prepare yourself with rehearsal, and perfect presentation with debriefing. These tools can be used in so many facets of life. Friendships, family, relationships, parenting, interviews, rock concerts, any place where you have to make tough decisions. If a tough situation is coming, motivate, rehearse, and afterwords debrief. The next time one of these situations arises you will be that much more prepared to deal with it. Become the best you every today. Tomorrow you can be alright with yesterday being the second best you until the next tomorrow.
